Upward movement in a downward spiral

So, a lot has happened since I last posted here. I remember talking about my struggles with Scarlet Blade. I have not deleted this game three or four times since my last post or even repented of liking it. I have dived in with both feet. I have made a lot of progress in the game, which feels like the opposite of progress in my life, my social / emotional health, my physical condition, and even my spiritual walk. I still love the game. I feel awful for liking this game, but it is so good. I’m actually really sad when I hear people saying it is dying.

Side note: If you’re looking for a game to play, you’re at least 18, and you don’t mind being sucked into a game with ridiculous hyperbolic innuendo and mildly offensive graphics, come join us! Let’s keep SB alive. We need some new players. Message me if you need help getting started. I have character on almost every level, and I would love to help you get started.

The Bartle types

So, I’ve mentioned before that I am a Socializer (This refers to the Bartle Test. I am all about interacting, helping folks out, and making new friends. I have made some solid social connections in this game. Somehow, I got invited to one of the most bad ass, OP, PvP guilds in my faction, by the guild master no less, because I like talking to people and helping out. That, to me, a total n00b, is cray cray, as they say. I mentioned in an earlier post that finding other folks in-game that understand single-parenthood is difficult. Well, these folks are totally cool with my consistent in consistency. They get it because many of them have been there. I also have made some very OP friends in other guilds as well. I feel so humbled by the people I get to hang out with. Oddly, along this path I have found that there is a little bit of a Killer in me. Since my guild is so known for PvP, I have a bit of a target floating over my head, and the other faction tends to gank me to the exclusion of others in contested zones. This has me really focusing on my PvP game and working to become as OP as I can be on my meager budget.

Again, luckily I have friends, and I have my guild. I have found that OP friends not only help with acquiring gear, but often they have the best advice on what gear to acquire. I have found that you not only need to pay attention to the overall rarity / quality of gear but also to the individual stats each piece has and whether or not those stats compliment your other gear, your skill set, and a number of other factors. This is way more complex than the D&D I played as a kid.

behemoth
Hanging with Katie, Hugs, and the gang, killing Behemoth

Finally, I have to note that ultimately it is nice to go “where everybody knows your name”, as Gary Portnoy once said, even if it’s your character name. Yesterday afternoon, I logged on and bought a new weapon. I went to Viledon, a pvp zone, to try it out. When I arrived, I was immediately greeted with hellos all around and invited to a team. The screenshot above is from yesterday afternoon. I had so much fun, mainly because I was there with a group of friends. Over the last six months here in this imaginary world I’ve come to know and to care deeply about a number of people I will likely never meet in real life. I know their hurts, their struggles, and their dreams. I look forward to hearing about their lives. I pray for them when they are hurting. Say what you will about this, but I have found deep and profound community in this least likely of places.

I have to say, that I still can’t really talk about this game to my real-life friends. I feel ashamed for liking it so much. I feel like I’ve experienced a downward spiral into complete depravity for being so desensitized that I don’t even notice the overtones and graphics anymore. So what, I kill monsters in sensible heels… that’s not awkward at all…

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